Family Life Dynamics Pillows

"My dad really went ballistic! I'm not grounded...I'm under house arrest!"

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"I built this tree house for my kids. But it's so private, I've decided to use it as my home office."

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

"Hold it right there, ma'am! If you get too close to the artwork, I'll have to ask you to leave the gallery."

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

'Are you finished eating yet, sweetie?...Guess that answers THAT question!'

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

"I know what this is, it's what mum and dad call 'working from home'...

'Honey, I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

"No, there was no 'Buy One, Get One Free.' You're twins."

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

Do you mind if we stop calling this a "starter house" now?

Hungry child

'Mom, Dad! Look what I created in lab today!'

"Someday she'll solve the world's problems."

Man dreams of romance whilst a woman dreams of romance and babies.

"Well, I'm thinking about boarding school. Though I'm not sure they accept adults."

'Like death by salad.'

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

True confessions.

"I don't know, kids. I've been a stay-at-home dad for so long it just sort of... happened."

'That reminds me, the seat broke on mine. I must make time to get it repaired.'

'She finds it really easy to juggle her kids with her career now she's joined the circus.'

The No No No's

'I can't control my anger when people get too close to my kids...'

Giving birth with your husband present may be more painful.

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

Relationship Warning Lights

"Why don't you come get me? Oh that's right, you aren't allowed on the couch!"