Family Financiers Pillows

'Well I think everything is in order, congratulations on your new home!'

"Mom, Dad, don't worry! I only want to leave you, but not your money!"

"Of course you can have some help from the bank of mum and dad, just as soon as we've had a word with the bank of grandma and grandad."

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

'It's okay. We'll just push our retirement plan back a bit.'

"Sorry, stock-market jitters."

"Dad, this is Wendy, she's going to re-negotiate my allowance!"

Excess Baggage: Sooner or later all those vacation bills come due.

How many times do I have to tell you. . . you're broke! Broke! Broke!

'I forgave ya for puttin' 'em all in one basket, but this goes too far!'

"I think you should provide a 401(k) with my allowance."

'You must know my kids...they spend like there's no tomorrow.'

'Just seeing how my shears are doing...'

'That was supposed to be your stock without equals, and it looks like you were right--no equals, just lots of superiors.'

Little Investment on the Praire

'Any annuity we can afford wouldn't pay the MILK BILL!'

'Children are all right, Carson, except they're so damned unprofitable.'

"Yeah, you're the CFO of a global multinational, but to me you'll always be the First National Bank of Dad."

"I wasn't very interested in numbers 'til I discovered you could make money out of them."

"My client, whom I shall refer to as your son, has retained me to represent him in these negotiations regarding an increase in his allowance!"

'Thanks...but according to the web, 80 of kids' allowances are now linked to the Dow.'

'It's our 10 year plan.'

'We don't have the money for everyone to go, and, well, our luggage has never been to the Bahamas before...'

"Don't take that tone with me! I was simply asking where you plan on spending all this money!"

Bank of Mum and Dad.

"Oh no - another mouth to feed!"

"No matter what one says, a safe remains a good way to keep your money safe."

"Yes, we have three children. Their names are time guzzler, career killer, and cost factor."

'Not a good time to ask for more allowance. They're discussing the national debt.'

Prophets are up.

'And if I agreed, what sort of means would we be living within?'

Credit card debt.

$200,000 to raise a kid in America! Do you regret the expense? Of course not, sweetie! You're worth every cent. That's a relief. Because I need $20 for the movies!

"Is there the slightest chance of credit being eased by this weekend?"

'A raise in your allowance? I'll have to go and change into my suit before I can answer that.'