Family Dinner Skeptic Pillows

'Five years of dinner at home with the family!'

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

"I'm afraid the challah got a little burnt this week."

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

"Oh, mournful and terrible engine of horror and crime—of agony and of death, not asparagus again!"

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

Mother feeds messy child with extra long spoon.

Newton had actually discovered gravity at a family dinner in his early childhood.

"That table is yours once that party decides to move to the suburbs."

"I hope we can sell everything before it's time for mom to make dinner."

'4 Jello desserts - and, for the love of God, please make them all the same color.' (at restaurant with three kids)

Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!

'Okay mum, I'll eat it all up. But I doubt I'll grow big and strong on this muck!'

"I grabbed it away from Larry and seasoned it properly just in time. It's a rescue meatloaf."

"We're going to see my family. There's an extra twenty in it for you if we never get there."

'I hope you all like stuffing.'

'Hurry up you guys! I'm about to serve dinner!'

"You've all been like a company to me."

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

"It's so nice to gather and enjoy a simple home-cooked meal together."

'As soon as your mother is through laundering the money we'll go out to eat.'

"And that's where hot dogs come from."

The First 3-D Thanksgiving

"Fridge-to-table"

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

"I thought we agreed that the dining room was a buffer zone."

'We thank you for this food and ask you to protect us from pesticides, additives and preservatives.'

'Could I trade all of this for more of that?'

'My daddy thinks you're really funny. He's always telling mommy about the clown he works for!'

"You heard your mother. There's no need to bless the superfoods."