Fame Chaser Mugs

School children looking at different careers from magazine covers, each involving celebrity status.

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

A click of cameras

"this week on, 'Celebrity Fear Factor,' contestants are threatened with total anonymity."

Signing cage.

'Being caught sober in your car is very bad for your career.'

"I read the judge your TV credits, but you're not a big enough celebrity he could let off!"

New Government Target - To make everyone a celebrity by 2010.

Modern Celeb Agent

"That's like so unfair, Mum, why do I have to do something to be famous? Why can't I just be famous?!"

"Looking good! Feeling great! And soon to be famous!"

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

'If I never get my 15 minutes of fame, I at least want a giant cutout face of myself.'

Like moths attracted to light...

As Seen On TV

'My blog has been favourited over half a million times but still no book deal!'

"Who'd have thought we'd still be doing this after 40 years. . ."

'People sometimes do the weirdest things when there's a camera around...and sometimes they don't.'

'Absolutely right, Ronnie - the hardest art is getting started to become famous by being famous."

"It's FANTASTIC I'm getting loads of hits on #WHATABIGTITIAM."

"His fan mail keeps ten secretaries busy. Writing it!"

Unknown but Working on it

Celebrity PR agency.

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

Proof you've made it Loud Annoying The voices raised against you

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

Job Centre - 'I'm afraid the only jobs we have available are as celebrities.'

". . . But, hey, man, I just want to say this in all sincerity, man, that you are the greatest, man, you the el numero uno cat in my book, man you. . ."

"Oh, Freddy! I just knew it would be like this!"

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

'As quickly as they had begun. Doug's fifteen minutes of fame came to an end'

She's listening, steer the conversation round to how you're gonna be on tv, drop a few names...

I stick with the celebrity instructors. If I heard of them, I sign up with them.

'Guess who's got his picture in the paper.'