Fairy Tale Financier T-Shirts

'I'm sorry my Queen, but Snow White also has a much healthier portfolio than you do.'

"Unfortunately Daddy already owes the government about 500,000 Pokemon cards."

Piggy bank #5: carrying (colour).

Sub-prime Bear

All I want for Christmas is a modest recovery in the GDP, along with expectations that the year-over-year growth rate will significantly improve in 2014.'

'And then the bad man from the Securities and Exchange Commission and I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house down!'

"The first thing we should do is get you two into a good mutual fund. Let me get out the 'Magic 8 Ball' and we'll fun some options."

'The prince and the princess lived happily ever after on their profits from capital-appreciation funds.'

"Don't forget, the market will take a sharp downturn on the stroke of midnight."

'...but then the Dow rallied and the blue chips began to rise...'

"If you believe, clap your hands. Don't let our IPO die!"

Open Wide The Dentist's View.

Make Your Portfolio BEARable.

'That's all for now. We'll find out if our hero emerges from Chapter 11 tomorrow.'

Business Fairy Tales.

"...and then the heroic young investor managed to capture the evil high interest rate monster and wrestled him down until he was a mere 5.25%!"

"The stock market hit 50,000 and everyone lived happily ever after."

Symbols of Wall St.

"It's just as easy to love a man with a pension as to love a man without one."

"Once upon a time there was a kind old bank that did not charge its customers a fee."

"I wish I was less gullible when it comes to money."

'Another golden egg Mr. Goose! At this rate you'll be a millionaire soon!'

"That's Jack from accounting. He's a magic bean counter."

'How to profit from a financial meltdown.'

'So the stock market hit 12,000 and everyone lived happily ever after.'

Jack and Jill

'Is there any point in the little piggy going to market?'

"The Prince and the Princess lived happily ever after on the income from their capital appreciation funds."

"No, you can't pay in camels -but we do accept goldfish!"

'Everyone lived happily ever after? Was the Stock at an all time high then, like it is now?'

'No prince meets princess, prince saves princess and they live happily ever after again. Read me something about mutual funds and IRAs.'

'...and if the rating agency didn't drop the kingdoms' creditworthiness, the prince and the princess lived happily ever after.'

"I've been thinking maybe I should invest some of me gold in stocks or bonds."

'I can take some of the swing out of your portfolio.'

'You used to be an investment consultant, Fred -- what should I do with this quarter I found?'