Facing Layoffs T-Shirts

"You've entered but you haven't abandoned hope."

Burning Down the House

"Any suggestions one who to get rid of?"

'My boss said they might be laying off more people next week...what wine goes best with panic?'

"Third quarter numbers were good after we cut our global workforce three to two."

Very Difficult Conversations

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

"Hire a cost cutting, bad-guy consultant to turn me into a good guy during the layoffs."

We're cutting the forest in half, so I'm going to need you to make the oxygen of two trees.

"You're a great team player - so we're trading you."

"Your job is to build an app that replaces you."

"The bad news is we've fired 80% of your office. The good news is we're fixing the coffee machine."

'It's my own fault. I never upgraded my skills. I was replaced by a man half my age with a more advanced smartphone and hundreds of productive apps.'

"It's not downsizing—it's just that we have 976 employees who have chosen to spend more time with their families."

41 Rounds of Layoffs Survived

The breakup

'The good news is we're not laying you off. The bad news is we want you to take a 20-year lunch break without pay.'

'Times are tough, Smith, but I don't want to lay you off. So, to keep you working, I want you to wash our building. That should keep you busy for the next decade.'

'You remember Mr. Horton? You know, the one you said to give the 'clean desk' award to? -- you fired him three years ago.'

"He used to be a senior fact checker at Meta — now he's just a pedant."

"I've been told to go through all our expenses...cut out any fat, get rid of any costly perks!"

'See, I told you - nobody's job is safe!'

"Of course, I'm not suggesting that you should also bail."

"The good news is that I'm still here after the boss cut our department by 33 percent."

'The facts speak for themselves: My opinion however is in the accompanying letter with your redundancy package.'

"Here's one I wrote myself. It's called 'Blues for the Guy I'm Laying Off.'"

You're Employment has been terminated -Smiley face lol

'I'm afraid we have to let you go. As you know, you're entitled to a 'Golden Handshake'...

'I've just thought of a way to save the company £1800 a month.'

"You're the only one in this department who has survived the staff cuts. I can only advise you to do your job well, otherwise I'll have to fire you too, got that?"

'There's new evidence that my departure from my previous employer merely coincided with their brain drain.'

'Due to budget cutbacks, we need to get by with less.'

'Hey, when you announce pay cuts like these, you've got to expect a few howls of protest!'

What Bob thought outside the box.

Office conversation