Facebook Browsing Prints

"...then click 'save settings', scroll down to 'done' and voila! You're on Facebook stalking Miriam's daughter's new husband."

Online form - Submit.

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

"Can I keep them? I found him on the internet?"

Evolution.

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

"Just one more site!" "I'm totally, like, in control!" "I can quit anytime I feel like it..."

Great British Eccentrics.

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

Obsession with the Internet.

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"You've got computer-breath."

Dad Trophies

Man doing a search on a computer

"Has the Wi-Fi seemed slow to you lately?"

'It was a real scroller. I couldn't put down my screen.'

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

Travelogue

"I've grown numb to exclamation points."

Bill glanced up from his computer. It was dark outside. He smelled of BO. A little voice inside his head whispered, 'you should probably log off now.'

'We no longer look at résumés. We go straight to your Facebook page.'

Clickbait

'I caught him watching tv, surfing the net, and playing video games ..book him!'

'I've been googling your condition and I'm afraid to say...I think I might have it myself.'

"Honey, come quick! This guy in the comments section just solved the Middle East crisis."