Eye Care Aficionados Gifts

'The smallest line I can read says 'Made In China'.'

'Dad, you have your glasses on, still.'

"I've had these glasses since I was a kid, when my doctor told me I'd grow into them..."

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

'He wasn't doing a bit good, until I changed his glasses.'

'No cheating'

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

'No thanks. I'm just squinting...'

'Throw them back They're not what nine out of ten eye doctor's recommend for dry eyes when stranded on a desert island.'

'I'm thinking about laser eye surgery.'

'Inadvertently, Optometrist Niles Frobe triggers the Global Financial crisis' 'You have a bad case of eyestrain. I want you to keep your eyes off the ball for a few weeks!'

'You've had the eye exam. Now buy the t-shirt!'

'Having trouble getting used to your new bi-focals'

'Those look good on you, They help make your nose look smaller,'

'You're right, Mom. Carrots did give me good eyesight. Now I can spot vegetables I don't like a mile away.'

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Macula'.

"He did well with his eye exam but was disappointed to find out that laser surgery won't help out his score when he plays laser tag."

"Eye irritation is quite common when Saturn and Jupiter are in this position. It's called conjunctivitis."

'Guess who I bumped into today? EVERYBODY!'

You know your getting old when you have to put on your reading glasses to trim your eyebrows...

Same Day Glasses - "They'll be ready in a month. It's not my fault you couldn't read the fine print."

George Washington's Birthday

"Am I seeing double? You and your twin are the experts, why don't you two tell me!"

"So I tell the ophthalmologist my eyes have been really sensitive to light lately and what's he do? He shines bright lights right in them!"

'Make sure they fit straight!'

A Pirate at the Opticians.

Dr. Harper had a special eye exam chart made for hieroglyphics professor patient.

"I think an IQ test would be more appropriate at this time."

The Adventures of Morton - Sensitive skin.

'Laser Surgery While You Wait.'

"Well, Mr. Swanson, I don't know that I can help you improve your standing in your focus group, but I can definitely check out your visual focus."

"Wrong, wrong, wrong and wrong. I'd like you to see another specialist. His office is closer to the eye chart."

'Dame Edna has a lot to answer for'

Contacts vs. Glasses