Exterminator Extraordinaire Pillows

'Jeffrey likes to think of himself as a small game hunter.Actually he's a pest control officer'.

"I think we're going to need a bigger trap, dear!"

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

"And where have you previously moused?"

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

'Your teacher doesn't mind a little clowning around in class, Eddie, but she thinks you overdo it.'

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

"So, who would you like me to call first, dear, the plumber or the exterminator?"

When cockroaches go unchecked.

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

'Hello, Acme Termite Control...?'

Never ending to do list

"I just figured she was holding all my calls. Turns out she's been running the company."

A rare picture of Henry VIII's divorce lawyer.

"Well, you said you wanted something to remove spiders from the bath!"

"Yes, Madame, Teletubbies."

'Looks like we're dealing with a mule deer infestation. I can get rid of them, but you'll have to wait until they're in season!'

'You might want to try another photographer, Sire. This one tends to cut the heads off.'

"We have a favor to ask."

Flies up the ante!

"I got over DDT, and I'll get over you!"

What did you think happens to all those vitamins that roll beneath the fridge?

'Mind if I head off a little early today?'

'It's not so much you having a cockroach problem - it's more along the lines of us having a human problem.'

"Oh, the usual - spreading pestilence and misery. You?"

William Tell Executions.

"Yep, it says "pesticide"! Not only are they trying to kill us, they also insult us by calling us pests!"

"This wasn’t a mouse, ma’am — it was a cartoonist."

Pied Piper uses 'Rat Nav'.

"These door hinges squeak."

"Well, what a coincidence, Jeff's in vermin control too!"