Expectant Parent Prankster Mugs

"...And this is my birth partner."

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

'Hey, I think my parents fooled me. This game is called 'Algebra Hero'.'

'We're playing trampoline, mom.'

"No! I am your father!" "Noooooo!"

"He looks like you, and he isn't even born yet."

"Congratulations, Mr and Mrs Starmer. It's a tool!"

"Guess who figured how to call 911!"

"'Routine examination' were the only two words in the doctor's mind when he placed the stethoscope on..."

"I'm too old for a baby-sitter. How about hanging a portrait with the eyes that always seem to look at you?"

'This not exactly what I had in mind when I told him about the birds and the bees.'

"You want me to explain how there were two doughnuts in the larder and now there is only one? Easy, it was too dark in there to see the second one."

It is always something whenever Grandmother watches little Louis.

Darling, you should have asked me to put sun tan lotion on your back and not the kids!

'Okay...now watch what happens when I extend my claws.'

'Daddy! Are you using the number forty clipper?'

'I'm not looking for treasure. I'm trying to find where I buried Dad.'

'You did that on purpose!'

"We should get a lot of money from the tooth fairy. I set out grandpa's false teeth!"

'Last year my kids put a sign on my back, but tomorrow, on April Fools Day, I'll be ready, they won't get me again.'

'I've only just learned to read, and I'm already on page twelve of my sister's diary.'

'If you find any loose ones, I have dibs on them for the tooth fairy.'

'Looks like we'll have this one by C section."

Yes, we have a 'Happy Meal'. It's when you leave the kids home.

How to avoid a heart attack.

"Doing chores is very stimulating. I'm always thinking of ways to avoid them."

'I fixed the dent in the bumper.'

'Today, dad has cooked and we're well prepared!'

Ask me about Naming Rights.

'Time out!... Scooper!!'

'Mind giving him his bath now- he'll be asleep when we get home!'

"Getting older at least gives me more time to get my own back on you!"

"Look, Tia Carmen, my moustache is growing in!"

"Uh, don't you think you're taking this bay-talk a little too far?"