Exercise Skeptics T-Shirts

'The only exercise I believe in is the exercise of power.'

Gym. Closed. It's weird. I could never motivate myself to come here, and now that I'm locked out, I'm itching for one of their workouts.

"You were right, Tom, golfing is great exercise. . . but I think this has been enough exercise for today!"

Completely worthless machines: The Exer-Segway.

'Jogging's too dangerous for me. I tried it once, and I rear-ended a mailman.'

'Welcome to the exercise hotline. To start a very low impact exercise program, press #1250 times.'

"MMPHH. . . I said I don't think I'm built for yoga!"

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

Gym. Check in Here. The only time I feel the burn is when I pay the memberbship fee.

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

Cyclist Flamingoes

Taking goldfish for a walk.

'I don't even care about the score, catty. I just enjoy the long walk.'

And this model comes with a fitness tracker.

'Gathering dust isn't dangerous in itself, but it's a sign of lack of exercise.'

'Are we having fun yet?'

"Fit watch say me need more steps."

"Professor Williams had at first been reluctant to join the Assistant Deans in their Think Great Thoughts aerobics. He later came to enjoy the activity."

'Why are jogging on the spot?'

The Remote Olympics

'Okay. . . five more! Spring forward! Fall back.'

'Then someone hit on the idea of selling our torture devices to fitness centers.'

'That's our group plan.'

"At least you made it into the hallway."

'I think cowboys are just plain lazy: Why else would you have to carry them all the time?'

'C'Mon ladies, work that bovine!'

"I didn't miss my workout...I didn't miss it one bit!"

Jeff was watching his weight.

'Can I have a refund if she puts the weight back on.'

Exercise Car.

"We daren't go in there at our age. We'd probably end up with slipped discos!"