Exercise Advocates T-Shirts

'Long periods of inactivity are not good for a pirate like you, Cap'n. You're taking root.'

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

'My feet are killing me.'

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

"This feels like an accomplishment."

On the back of the t-shirt...

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

Man practising karate is tempted by a glass of beer.

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"It seemed like miles to me!"

Sam's Gym. My problem is I can't get the body I want with the body I've got!

Exercise Class

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

"OK, ready to go again?"

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

Biceps, muscles and brawn

Running

Yoga vs. Prosecco

"Uh-oh. My inner GPS is recalculating."

'His workout regimen consists of 50 sit-downs every day.'

"I feel off. I want to feel off and running."

"And then on ab day they roll on their backs, flail, and mimic us in the throes of death."

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

"I told him he should have trained more."

'He taught me the importance of taking a walk each day.'

Jogging Bottoms

Staff. Manager. So then you must say "I refuse to lift weights." Hey, that's not what I expected when I hired you to be a resistance training instructor!

"I exercised so much during my first pregnancy that the baby was born with athlete's foot."