Executive Tinkerer Prints

"What kind of crazy management scheme is this?"

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"Young Frankenstein"

Robot Parts $5

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

The Computer Bore

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

Needed Inventions: An Airbag To Protect The Viewer Against A Really Lousy Program.

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

"...and before you embark upon life's journey, could one of you help me with my laptop?"

Drool Marks

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"

Early cyborg.

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

The Not-So Smart Meter

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

Mouse in a hamster wheel.

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

Gadget geek.

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

'I think I see what's making your funny noise.'

Bicycle sat nav.

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

'Roger's busy making a cat-flap in the kitchen.'

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

Congratulations on your retirement!

'I'm no expert, but I think we're a little behind when it comes to the latest industry technology.'

"The man who invented autocorrect died from the corona vibrator."

"No, it's not a bug. Since you keep losing you phone, I purchased you a phone-locating drone."

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'