Executive Escapades Pillows

"Guess who's going to be on national television apologizing to the American public."

"On the plus side, you're on the cover of all the major business publications."

"No need to give me credit . . . I'll just take it."

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"He likes it."

'Ah, Galagher, we made good use of your proposal.'

Busy Workload Today and Especially Tomorrow

'Ladies and gents, the executive-worker pay ratio is not what it used to be!'

'Not exactly what I meant by job creation.'

"Profits. Good thing or the greatest thing?"

"Executive shoeshine and bald head buff, sir?"

"This new policy of resisting change is certainly innovative."

"Thursday makes it ten years. What do you say we renew our merger vows."

'We'll wait until the ex-ceo's cigar smoke clears before beginning.'

'Another corporation I wouldn't have minded so much, but this was a hostile takeover by my secretary!'

"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

Executive Conkers.

'Well, Higgins, today it's on you to do the most dangerous job here. You've got to feed the board of directors!'

"Patel confirmed"

"I've got a lot on my plate right now. For starters, I need to sharpen my pencil, refill my coffee and get a new comb."

"I'm sorry - Mr. Streetwise is never in."

CEO (Out to lunch).

"Remember when 'The sky's the limit' was something we wanted to hear?"

'But RG, you can't be a big fish in all the big ponds...you can only be a big fish in your big pond.'

'I love being a rich executive so please don't let me get so bad that I won't be suspended with pay.'

"Another tiny victory in my never-ending quest for fun."

"Excuse Wilson, he's still in flight mode."

'Excuse me, have you got a coat hanger? I'm locked out of my car.'

'That's why we're vice-presidents, and he's president.'

My husband's dynamic, aggressive executive material, but he's too shy to say so!

'I'm contributing to the national happiness index.'

We're a paperless office, except for executive bonuses.

CEO washroom...private: 'Well, at least it's lonely in here.'

"It's sad to think how many of the parachutes these days are merely gold plated."