Evolutionary Eccentric Pillows

How Platypuses Are Born

"Something very big buried a lot of bones here."

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

Great British Eccentrics.

"I work out in preparation for being out of shape for the next 30 years."

Newt sale

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

Imagine

'I'm not a magician, but I do keep live doves in my pants.'

Yoga Sequence to Avoid

"Rob is a functioning train wreck."

She did only twenty-eight of the thirty-two fouetts in the Black Swan pas de deux . . . or are my eyes deceiving me?

Stegosaurus (say the evolutionists). Nonsense (say the creationists).

'I know, but he's a genius.'

"Who are These People?"

"Why don't other people ever do this?"

Human and alien exchange sex toys.

A mad scientist.

Problem solving centre.

'To hell with the rules.'

"Oh and, incidentally, Whit, I'm afraid there's room for only one haircut like this around here."

'Going down?'

Clown escaping a shipwreck on an inflatable unicycle.

"Why can't you just read in bed?"

Man talking to a tree.

A Macaroni in 1773

'First the good news: he has 3 excellent legs.'

The Water Diviner

'Well, Dear, if you must roam about the house dressed as a chicken, that's fine, but please close the drapes when you do!'

'You knew I was a mad scientist when you married me!'

'You knew I was a mad scientist when you married me!'

'I bet you think you have known interesting people before, not like me. I am truly fascinating.'