Eternal Hypochondriac Mugs

'I want to be buried next to a physician!'

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

"It's interpret-your-own-test-results day today."

'I hope what I have isn't catching.'

"Are you sure you're not holding your breath?"

"Apparently reading about cancer can give you cancer!"

'Life is ruining your health.'

'I'm convinced I've got page 68 of my medical dictionary, doctor!'

Stay away from Pigs.

'Good to see you, Doc! I wonder if you could take a look at my left upper arm that hurts when I do this?'

"I looked up my symptoms on the Internet and it said I might get old!"

Hospital. Patient to stomach specialist: 'What's your gut-feeling, Doctor?'

"I looked up your rash online. Have you recently been to one of the moons of Saturn? Or, it could just be poison ivy."

'I don't feel that bad.'

Type A Flu.

Bob had many issues, but he didn't need a doctor. He needed a vet.

"O.K. Which one of you worried well is the most worried?"

"Good news and bad. You do not have hypochondria."

"You're in excellent health...until we can prove otherwise."

How to Keep the Doctors Guessing

'Well, you are one lucky hypochondriac. There's a generic placebo for your condition.'

'It's only hypochondria, but it's a very virulent FORM of it.'

'Well, Doctor, what do I have and is it contagious?'

"I think I've got analysis paralysis."

"Hypochondriac's Handbook. Where was I?"

"Just as I thought Brian... Cybercondria."

'Nothing too serious, I think, but better safe than sorry.' 'PLAGUE!! PLAGUE!!'

'Good thing you came in. Most men just ignore the warning signs.'

'Please let me go home. . . I feel completely healthy.'

'Excuse me, haven't we met before?'