Equine Joke Lover Mugs

"Ivermectin! Ha ha they're taking it! Ooh I peed a little..."

"Where is everyone?" "You had 'everyone' killed." "Stalin family reunion"

"You say that using a colicky horse to pull you out of the mud may actually help his colic?"

Man in office on saddle: 'You heard right. I just got hired as a desk jockey.'

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

'So....how many hours were you practising half pass this morning?'

"The good news is, the side effects of your nut allergy aren't really dangerous."

EAT HAY LOVE One Horse's Search for Everything

"You're wearing it backwards."

"Sure he's handsome. . . But I've heard he's hung like a human."

Riding School: Horse eating a compendium.

'My mother was a race horse. My father was a stablehand who got five years for sodomy.'

'Now that she is pregnant, can she have a rhinoceros injection and a Catholic operation?

'See? When we both make that little jog to the right at the last minute...'

Occidental

'The Zoo just ain't what it used to be!'

'Are you playing hoofsie with me?'

Rider Helping Horse Over the Jump

Ways to mount a horse

"You can lead me to water but you can't make me drink, unless it has added food coloring and sweeteners."

"I don't think I'd mind so much if it was another woman."

"I wish you'd shut that door! - Were you born in a barn??"

'Is it me or are you getting taller?'

The Tandem: A Romantic Gallop

What time is it Mr. Wolf? Like I haven't heard that one before!

'Talk about a disastrous blind date: A quick look at her teeth told me she was a lot older than she said...'

"Guess what! I didn't even know I was broken but tomorrow I'm gonna get 'fixed!'"

Will sing for pony nuts.

'You know I have a race tomorrow.'

"Are those noodles?"

'Frankly, the only way to ease your back-pain would be for your rider to go on a diet...'

'I don't like photo finishes: I never look good in them...'

Going Under the Jump