Equestrian Quipster Mugs

'When I'm in the saddle I'm part of the horse.' - 'Yes, but which part?'

Man cutting hedge next to two heads impaled on sticks. Signs beneath say 'You missed a bit' and 'You can do mine next'.

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

Man in office on saddle: 'You heard right. I just got hired as a desk jockey.'

"All dishes marked with an asterisk are served with sarcasm. . ."

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 4

'Is the water cold?'

'What a gyp! Yesterday, after I got fixed, I put my testicles under my pillow, and all I got was a quarter!'

It is a good idea to start by learning how to mount your pony.

Official Seal

The Enemy

Show Jumping Tantrums

Before her first dressage competition, Kate suffered from Pre-Traumatic Stress.

A Few Common Ailments

"Wife and two hernias to support!"

Polo pony

Death Watch

'I'm not taking any chances with the water jump this year.'

Horse accidents

"I signed up for 'Dressage Without the Horse.'"

"Boy, this is the life: For a bit of riding every day, we get fed, pampered and groomed..."

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Racing - No. II - IV

Over. Under. Sideways. Kid.

Journalist Interviewing a Fallen Rider.

Riding School: Horse eating a compendium.

"You're wearing it backwards."

Grooming: Make sure your pony is securely tied.

Grump Horse and Rider

'Argh! This itching is driving me crazy!'

Riding School Accidents

"But we had stir-fry last night and the night before."

'My mother was a race horse. My father was a stablehand who got five years for sodomy.'

Probable result of the Cochin China Fowl mania.

'I got 50p - how much did you get?'

"The Badminton Horse Trials."