
'I think it's damn unprofessional for a dermatologist to scream 'Yikes' like that.'
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'I think it's damn unprofessional for a dermatologist to scream 'Yikes' like that.'
"No, I don't think we need counseling. This is our first date."
"I'll go out with you, as long as we don't have to go IN anywhere."
"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."
Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.
"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."
Love at First Sight
I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.
'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'
Romance
Speed Dating for Turtles
"When you say that love is in the air, you're referring to the smells from the food trucks, right?"
"Oh, God, no, please, no, God, no..."
On my list of outdoor pursuits I put skinny dipping way ahead of this.
"She's in a conversationally induced coma."
"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."
I only have eyes for you
"Let's say you've always wanted to make someone a mixtape to show them how much you care about them. What's the best order? Do you start with songs about how rich you are before moving on to the songs about love? Or vice versa?. . .What order would best simulate sincerity?"
"Mr. Right!"
Relationship Warning Lights
'I'll be darned! A nipple mood ring!'
'Of course I'm on the pull - I'm a cricketer.'
"I know we just met, but all I got is a twenty-four-hour pass!"
Hug and Do a Chorus Line Kick.
"If you let down your guard, I'll walk over the moat."
Klimt Kiss Phones
I really think I can handle this date on my own. Lemme ask you something. Would you trust me alone with a ybot 340? An Xbox 360? They changed the name? Okay. But you cannot hit on my date. I'm only here to help.
"Wow, I just love the way you waddle!"
"You don't know me well enough to not care how I look."
"Let's fall in love and live in the subjunctive."
"She's just being Koi."
"I guess opposites do attract. She's a real shaker, and he's such a grind."
Love linked
"Honestly, sweetheart, you're not like the others I've been out with."
"If you lied about where you are from, what else have you lied about?"
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