Enjoys Satire Mugs

'You have a choice. An ultra-expensive medication that may cure you but has the side-effect of bankruptcy, OR a low-priced medication with a side-effect of a near-death experience.'

'Sorry, you're not suitable for the post of Assistant Beggar.'

Eddy passes the tax officials exam.

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

The Berlin Peace Movement

Reese Witherspoon

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

"Do Mr. Reaper, do you have health insurance?"

Bureaucracy gone mad!

'Probably giving evidence at some sort of industrial tribunal....heh!'

'Upon further review, the pig did not have control of the ball prior to being eaten...'

"I hate weddings. They make me feel a momentary lapse of cynicism."

Family Butcher.

The Notre Dame Five Year Restoration Plan Swing Into Action.

The Modern Damocles -

The Unknown Philosopher, who first realised life is no picnic.

'Our new assignment is to get Iran and North Korea to blow each other up.'

Knights of the Round Whatever

ENNUI...(smiley face).

"I'm a huge fan of your work."

"Maybe I will and maybe I won't - You're not prejudiced against transvestites, are you?"

Bureau of Missing Door Knobs

'Nobody special, but rich enough to build this statue of himself.

John Banville

Art Vandalism

Well done, Harris. That's one of the straightest paperclips I've ever seen.

'Now that I think about it, you're right: Like bankers, we thrive on the misfortune of others...'

"Thanks a bunch. I'll just run these by our committee and pass them along."

This would be Andy's first and last day as golf instructor at Sunset Oaks Country Club: "Remember, *hic*....Always jerk your head up and swing at the ball as hard as you can."

'Never to be seen again!"

'A role model? Yes, I suppose he was. Everywhere he went, people would say 'That's Bill Fenton... You don't want to be that guy!''

Might Versus Right.

An Angel with a Devil's Shadow

"New law, Diogenes. We're confiscating your barrel."

Suppliers of fine pin-stripe