The Humorist With A Taste For Satire Mugs

'Nobody special, but rich enough to build this statue of himself.

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

"Gee, thanks pal."

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

Mac's Bait and Sushi Shop

Honest Vending

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

Sock Puppet in Literature

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

'I don't think the employees like me.'

'He doesn't like people walking in - try crawling.'

"I see the White House didn't lower the flag to half staff."

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

'I'm no expert, but I think we're a little behind when it comes to the latest industry technology.'

' It's a bit of an anti climax - I've washed it but I can't go any where ! '

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

'Mom, Dad... we found out that in a previous life, Sheila was a dog and I was a tree. That's why we decided to marry to continue this promising relationship!'

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

"Pendleton, as of noon today your services will no longer be required. Meanwhile, keep up the good work."

Bureaucracy gone mad!

German School