Engineering Manager T-Shirts

Factory foreman says: 'Sometimes the machines here do try to take over the world. Last week the coffee maker even had a go.'

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"Living in a city with functional infrastructure must be so boring."

"Looks like we found the issue."

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

Where your mind & battle are los

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated.

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

"My email is down... talk to me."

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"Young Frankenstein"

Hollywood Sign Developers

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

In basket-case.

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."