Engagement Pillows

"Susan, this might be just the wine talking, but I think I want to order more wine."

"You are my blue beach glass."

"Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?"

"I'll agree to a pre-nup if you'll agree to a non-compete clause."

Thoughts

"It's Lida Bascom's husband - he's frightfully unhappy."

"How do I love thee….? Let me count the ways…" "I'm going to want a recount."

"I'm looking for a man who doesn't want anything to do with the wedding planning."

"Someone must love someone very much indeed."

"Interesting. Have your lawyer call my lawyer."

'For those who the internet hath brought together, let no man put asunder...'

"And do you both promise to believe you can be better than all the other married couples you've ever seen?"

Ahhh...young and in love, a thrifty Mr. Tramp selects only the best flowers for ever date...

"I think this calls for a little banjo."

"Charles, would you be my vintner?"

A man and woman face each other in profile. A diagram of their brains shows their desires.

Mergers or acquisitions.

"I had a nice time, Steve. Would you like to come in, settle down, and raise a family?"

'We complete each other...'

"That's out of my price range. Do you have anything that's free?"

Tradition v. Reality: 'My client agrees to 'love', but needs clarification on 'honor', and 'obey' is a deal-breaker...'

I know it seems a bit misplaced, but it does pay all the wedding expenses !'

'Too pricey? Perhaps you wish to see something in macaroni and spray paint?'

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

'You'll never guess what I got you.'

'Didn't you get my e-mail'

'I've fully costed my wedding plans, Daddy.'

'And by clicking on 'I Agree,' you agree to the terms and conditions...'

'How worse? Give me the worst-case scenario.'

'Did you get my Re: Marriage Proposal'

"I do. Have your people contact my people to hammer out the details."

Australian wedding, sheep gesturing, 'If there's anybody here who knows why these two should not be wed...'

"It's a major fixer-upper. How's your marriage?"

'Darling, how romantic...a pre-nup.'

'Subject to contract, will you be my wife?'