Engagement Ring Seeker Mugs

'We recommend that you get a ring of equal weight for the other hand to prevent improper alignment of your spine.'

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

Pyjama party

'He wants to close the deal with a handshake. What do you think about that?'

Exposed Intimacy Safety Vulnerability Hidden Enmity

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

'You're proposing to me with, cubic zirconias?... But, you're a diamond dealer!'

Romantic Coffee Dates

They all have one thing in common...they all have bad breath.

'Love and marriage?- I'm afraid I can't help you much with that, young fellow.'

"A see through nighty? God who'd want to see you through that?"

"I’ll give you my answer in ... just ... one ... minute."

The Basic Blueprint for 99% of Today's Conversations (or So it Seems)

Unplugged.

"Better than a hunting dog - she sniffs out wifi hotspots."

"I think he had the idea he was looking at costume jewelry."

'Ooh, let me see... I'm hungry for affection?'

"I had an amazing hug dream."

'Darling what will you give me for this ring?'

'It was my late grandmother's. She would've wanted you to have it.'

"I too want companionship, intimacy, someone to grow old with, but not 24/7."

"I need a hug."

'Are you nodding in agreement, or falling asleep?'

"I'll get back to you, I'm at a fairly important meeting"

"Well Frank, now I've met you, I think I'll adjust my visibility, click profile, locate visibility options and make myself available for a second date..."

The benefit of a joint geography and geometry degree.

Online Couples Therapy

'It's lonely at the top, Miss Jones. Come in and give me a cuddle.'

After 15 years Mike was released

A cold day in Hell.

"Links"

'Isn't that cute? He wants affection.'