Email Marketers Prints

It's time, sir. Why don't you go first today. Ahem. Monkey Vicodin finance home office. Elongated African banking sex freak. The contest to see who got the day's weirdest email subject line. Spammers, we have a tie.

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"My email is down... talk to me."

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

Lynching on social media

"Greetings, I'm the bluebird of dank memes."

Online form - Submit.

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

Out and In.

'Had I known Hell was going to be exactly like work, I probably wouldn''t have spent as much time there.'

CEO with SEO

"I don't post selfies because I don't want people to feel better or worse about their looks."

"You know, there are other emojis."

Likes: $2.

'Homepage Sweet Homepage'

"It's OK to close tabs. Just click on it. Once you realize that you don't need that many open, it'll get easier. You can do this!"

I should probably get out more.

"A one-word email reply... classic power move."

'I'm sending another scam email requesting money to help free Willy...'

A secretary at a desk with a nameplate the says Dot Com.

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"Sorry, website closed for lunch."

'I bought him to retrieve my e-mails.'

"The video of you eating my $700 John Varvatos got 300 'likes.'"

Connected to Technology.

Man doing a search on a computer

Person with eyes focused on a computer screen.

"I'm trying to Google what I was thinking about twenty minutes ago!"

"I'll have you know that, '#dirtylitterbox' is trending on Twitter."

"It's not an actual hotdog, but digital ownership in a picture of an actual hotdog."

"I'm swamped but I can squeeze you in for a few moments yesterday."

"He sits there all day waiting to chase the email man."

'I have a homepage, therefore I am.'

Spam in Hell.