Elder Wisdom Seeker Gifts

Sadie, I just heard something disturbing, and I think you're the only one who can tell me whether it's true. Youtube is telling me we've lived 300 years of phantom time. Pope Gregory XIII's math was off when he created our calendar, and this is actually the year 1717. What's more, the "Middle Ages" is just a fiction the pope created to explain his rounding error. You were there, Sadie ... Did King Arthur really exist? I'll tell you all about that nice boy, as soon as I demonstrate how we dealt w

"Feel free to take notes."

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

'Do you think that's wise?'

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

"O young, naive one...you must know the golden rule of the kitchen. To avoid the mother of all disrespects...never criticize the cooking of a family elder."

'He was just saying that all things come to him who waits and, sure enough, along came a lightning bolt.'

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

'Oh, crap.'

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

"But how do I accomplish that in 140 characters or less?"

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

How Rings In Nature Indicate Aging.

"Life's a lottery - That's why you need balls"

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"Always take the bull firmly by the tail and look him directly in the eye..."

Beyond the known and the unknown.

'You must heal yourself.'

"Smoke a cigar that fits your face."

"Look, if I had all the answers, would I be living alone on the top of a mountain?"

"Don't you want to hear about the day I had?"

'O mighty gods! - May you grant us food, clothing, and shelter, and the wisdom to know the difference.'

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

Man selling 'pearls of wisdom'.

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

Middle Age: When you finally get your head together, and your body starts to fall apart!

Caveman to kid: 'There's more to life than what you read on cave walls.'