Egg Pun Aficionado Pillows

"He's right, Humpty. You don't have a leg to stand on."

CSI: Mother Goose Unit...'Hmmm...I'm beginning to suspect that perhaps mister Dumpty's demise wasn't simply a tragic accident.'

hard-boiled egg...

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

"Hic. Gosh and begorrah!" "Wha?"

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

"I hear you've a complaint about the eggs..."

A Pirate Egg Prisoner about to Walk the Plank into a boiling pot of water

Humpty Dumpty in Occupational Therapy

"Babies come from WHERE?!"

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

'All right, so you've prepared your resignation . . . let me have it!'

"This IS a chicken fried steak!"

'I hate it when they order scrambled eggs.' (chef shaking chicken).

"I forgive you, Bumpty."

'I think I know what makes you tick!'

I knew from the starch we were a perfect mash.

"In financial news, Greek shares continue their slide. Of note, International Feta Cheese continues to crumble."

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

"Sir, we've intercepted a transmission regarding a large shipment of eggs, but it's scrambled."

"There weren't any more clown fishes at the pet shop, so they got me - a jester fish."

"I'm going to start with the antipasta."

Big Birthday Boy Breakfast.

"Guac-A-Mole"

"Nothing to worry about. A nuggetectomy is a very simple procedure."

I'm sorry, but your drug screen results disqualify you as an employment candidate, You see, sample 'A' is a normal brain, sample 'B' is a normal brain on drugs, and sample 'C',,, Well, Mr, Dumpty, sample 'C' is your brain,

"Funny-all the king's horses don't seem to be helping at all."

"I'm afraid you have only three minutes to live."

Humpty the Game Warden

"I hear this place is a hotbed of international pancakes."

What on earth are you doing? Well, you wanted battered sausage, didn't you?

'I get a lot of job offers..'