Efficiency Enthusiasts T-Shirts

'I hear your distribution network is second to none.'

Man in clinic sees sign, 'In the interest of efficiency, clothing is optional.'

Run, Mike, Run!

"Why can't I get anything done unless I'm totally stressed out about it?" "Is it possible to be relaxed and still be productive?" "What is wrong with my brain?" "Why don't you work better?"

'Yesterday's work ethic ... Today's don't care ethic.'

'I've got an idea for improving productivity...Stop having meetings and start working.'

"His productivity apps pushed him to an early grave."

'...I've decided on our efficiency slogan - 'Just do the Business - Eliminate Waste.''

Companies are looking for alternative transportation

NHS Efficiency Drive

"The subject of this never ending meeting was how to keep meetings short..."

"The report's not ready? Harrison, you've got to use your time more wisely!"

Where your mind & battle are los

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

Colour Version: Living by the Clock

'Office' block tightening it's belt

"That report on corporate redundancy... I'd like it in triplicate."

"I used to love power, but now I'm more interested in mileage."

Motivation to work

'Everyone in the company wears one, Yomp! It's what keeps us focused!'

Late/Too Late.

"A one-word email reply... classic power move."

"This works, so why do we need to spend all that energy building a nest?"

"And with the optional remote you make all these little lights go off and on really quickly." You can have an IT system with all the latest bells and whistles...or you could have one that WORKS

"I'm too busy to be stressed."

"The anger management consultant said he wasn't going to alter his **** dates at this t****stage which fits in with the 'managing change' consultant who said it was to late to change her plans..."

'The massive arrests have made the plans for downsizing much easier.'

Desk Boxes: 'In', 'Out', 'Could Go Either Way'.

"I'm so efficient I can screw up two assignments in the time it takes most people to screw up just one."

Failure/Due Diligence

Cat shoes: For those who are too busy to do their own walking.

Instant Laundry Detergent, 'Just add water'.

'We've cut and pasted your list into 84 arbitrary sub-lists. Well, our work here is done.'