Educational Joker Prints

'I wish you had chosen a more pertinent educational issue than 'Do Dogs Actually Eat Homework?''

"If I forget something I learned before and then remember it again, will it count as something I learned today?"

"I think those are just to keep the teachers from leaving."

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'...And here we have the 'Laugher Curve.''

"Because when you're drafted by the pros, you'll have to be able to sign your contract. That's why you have to attend first grade."

'I reckon we have grounds for a libel action, don't you?.'

SEX EDUCATION, 'It's a crazy idea, but it just might work.'

"If I can't use a calculator, may I use my Dad's old slide-rule?"

Teacher to student: 'Nice use of glitter, but you were assigned to do math problems.'

"Well, if the test is multiple choice I choose not to take it."

'How could I have missed these? I took a multivitamin.'

"First period music always leaves me with a tune stuck in my head for the rest of the day."

Laboratory: Protons /Electrons/Morons

'Today: The collective unconscious...'

'It's a guess. I never said it was an educated guess.'

"No, I don't believe Michaelangelo ever did any bobbleheads."

"This year, I'm starting school with a positive attitude! You have my word...I'm waiting till the second week of school to call it the worst year of my life."

'I'm sorry, Sally, you can't buy a vowel.'

"Sorry, class, but because of new deregulations, I don't have to teach you anything this year."

'You got everyfink Bruv? Stink bombs, pea shooter, dead frogs . . .'

'No, fear isn't one of the basic taste sensations.'

'Your student Clara has tested as Talented and Gifted. But only in metal sculpting. You'll need to start incorporating metal sculpting into your daily lesson plans starting...tomorrow.'

"Will this global warming mean we'll have longer summer vacations?"

'But your book proved that gravity is a very weak force.'

"Since I'm your favorite student, do I even have to take this test?"

"So...what did you learn in school today, Baldo?"

Final Exams Today

Do I get extra credit for neatness?

"Where am I going to find the perfect thesis topic that hasn't been on TikTok already?"