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Studies in Social Progress No. 12

Continuing education.

Paranormal A-Z...

"Sarah's grades are excellent. She got A+ in 'Yogi Berra: Philosopher or Fall Guy?,' A in 'Dollars and Scents: An Analysis of Post-Vietnam Perfume Advertising,' A in 'The Final Four as Last Judgment: The N.C.A.A. Tournament from a Religious Perspective,'

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

"This is a test. This is only a test. IF this had been the real world it'd be your job you'd be fighting for, not a letter of the alphabet."

"Should we put down what we think is right, or what we think you think is right?"

'I like the history professor but I think he's mired in the past.'

'My name is Jeremy and I approved this message.'

'It's not for homework. It's for traction.'

"Where am I going to college? I thought this was college."

"You know, I'm really more the 'humanities' type."

'Hey, Dad. We learned all about the Kama Sutra at school today... Oh no, not the Kama Sutra, I mean The Magna Carta.'

'There's one app we can't give you ... aptitude.'

'If your cell phone has five hundred minutes, and you use one of them during this class, how long will you be in detention?'

The new boy was teased for being different.

'Do you feel as foolish as I do, having a conference with Billy's teaching machine?'

I got into the college everyone wants to go to! Well played. It's the perfect fit for me! Way to go! Eco-Club. Which one is it? Dunno. Why do you care? So I don't apply there!

End school zone. Start unschool zone.

"I didn't have enough fingers. I had to use a couple of toes."

PTA Meeting Tonight: Parents,Teachers,Attorneys

'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'

'That's a bad omen no sooner does he invent the wheel than he has the first ever road traffic accident.'

"A few centuries ago, there was a very primitive system for data transmission: it was called Synapse.

'Could I see you after class?'

Exam Room.

"I'm looking for a book on how to raise kids easily, but I can't seem to find it anywhere..."

"I attempted Greek Math and stuck out like a Thor sum."

Board? Weed a book.

'He can call whoever he wants, she's still not parking that thing in my classroom!'

'I don't mind school, but I'm really tired of the commute.'

'Sir, is the stuff we learn in this experiment supposed to go into our long or short term memory?'

Giant cat at school open night.

A teenager is bent double under a globe-shaped school bag.

"I tried talking to the principal about what I’d be teaching next semester, but he kept changing the subject."