Easygoing Employee Gifts

"I see here it's been quite a while since your last performance review."

Gifts from the House of Low Goals.

To determine which department would be awarded the Billings contract, employees agreed to play a best-of-five dodgeball tournament.

Find out that man's name and give him a rise.

"Fridge-to-table"

Desk boxes: 'In', 'Out', and 'What ever'.

"Too much caffeine for Mr. Hopper"

If only it was true...'I'm raising all your salaries by 50%...'

"You go the extra mile for us, but in the wrong direction."

"Every time he elbow bumps me, he hits my funny bone on purpose."

'All right, who's been sitting on the copier again?'

T-shirts will allegiance to different types of music on, while one guy has a shirt that reads 'middle of the road is all right with me.'

'I'm leaving early cos I didn't come in so late'

110% Job Performance.

'Reading the want ads? No, they just happened to be on the same page as this fascinating story on...um...cosmetics.'

'I just started at the bottom and I like it there!'

'Pemberly, I'd like to tweak you ignorance.'

'He passed on the climbing wall but had a go at the glass-blowing.'

"Larry goes out of his way to get along with difficult employees!"

"Harry!"

"The following programme is guaranteed to be pure fluff, with no social messages whatsoever."

"Go with the flow, boys!"

'Low maintenance gardening'

'I'm an under achiever, what do you do?'

'Harry, you're so relaxed, happy, non-confrontational...have you gone bi-partisan on me?'

"Looks like accountants are not as boring as you think they are."

"No, we do not wish to live with a family and learn to speak Serbo-Croatian."

'There's no need to overtake me... what's the hurry?'

Path of least resistance.