Dream University Planners T-Shirts

"He said his first word, 'Harvard'."

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

Road Forks in the Road: No Way and Yes Way.

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

I'm getting ready to apply for college. Do you have a list of party schools?

'Congratulations, you graduated.'

'Your pediatrician? No. . . I'm your baby's college admissions representatives.'

'I told you hard work would pay off in the third grade, Cate...You've had three job offers.'

'When I grow up I want to join the SWAT team!'

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

'I wish his guidance counselor spent more time on college plans and less time suggesting names for his band.'

"My papie says I'm going to be the first in my family to go to college!"

"If we take a late retirement and an early death, we'll just squeak by."

'I told you he's gonna be the next Warren Buffett!'

'OKAY, okay Sandra, I'll PAY for your University course. But it BETTER NOT cost me an arm and a leg!...'

'It's an idea whose time has come, Mr. Mayor -- 'drive-through traffic court'!'

"I'm looking forward to the next thirty five years of her living with us."

'And here's my collection of stock in DiscoCorp... or as I call it, your college fund.'

"We can determine your child's gender, IQ and student debt load."

'That's all there is in my college fund? That won't even buy the beer!'

"The extent of your extracurricular activities in high school, may very well be participation in regular program of oral hygiene using an effective decay preventaative tooth paste, but that won't get you into a good university."

"I just don't know what to do with myself in that long stretch after college but before social security."

'Fortunately our generation won't have to pay the huge debt. Our grandchildren will.'

"Your grandfather decided to put his entire fortune into a trust fund until Judgement Day."

MBA, PhD £100,000 student loan. Please Help.

Universidad

"Being from another planet is worth thirty points towards your child's admission to Harvard."

'Yes! How does if feel to be giving birth to a future kicker in professional football?'

'Well, Gosh...! How did you know I was an incoming freshman...?'

'I'm working on a ten year degree. Four years in school, and six years to pay off my student loans.'

'You're never going to follow me in my trade, Son - you may as well go to university.'

'If you aren't careful, son, you'll be mathematically eliminated from all of the Ivy League schools.'

"Do you think about life after high school? Like...what are you taking when you go to college?"