Dosage Doubter Pillows

"Take two pills every four hours. Or, take four pills every two hours and get better even faster." What he thought he heard.

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

'Every time I turn my back, he's learned another one of your bad habits.'

"I've been studying reverse psychology at Tonga Tech Online University."

"All those in favor of adding another 5 billion organisms to our probiotic just for the fun of it..."

"May I remind you that I'm still in charge here, Baskin. And when I say, 'Jump,' you say, 'How many floors.'"

"Siri, are you out of your mind?!"

Door labelled: 'False Economy Analysis & Research.'

'Never, ever give the benefit of doubt to a Brussells sprout.'

"On a scale of one to ten. How happy would you say you are?"

Santa's grotto advertising 'Talk to Santa', is next to a diet clinic with a sign in the window, 'Santa, talk to us.'

'Is this a trick question?'

'Carrot cake!.. What's next?.. Broccoli cake?'

I'm sorry I couldn't come up with a reason for you to live, Al. I blame it on the fact that I got my medical degree from Trump University.

"No, I'm sorry Geoff. I still can't remember you ever having a six pack there."

Sania Mirza

"I'm skipping straight to a second opinion, in the first one, I thought you were OK."

"Hmmm, not sure I trust that kale."

"I don't know if I want to marry, but I would like a combined household income."

"There's no way in hell this is what it's all about."

'Blindly following market trends generally works for me, but when it doesn't, I blame computer trading.'

"Do you want to do that hilarious thing where we read the itemized deductions and then say 'in bed'?"

"I'm looking over you chart and I see you've gained 30 pounds. I thought you went on a diet!"

'When you told me to refuse second helpings you said nothing about third,fourth or fifth helpings.'

'Social media? There's nothing social about it!'

'According to this rubbish I'm going on a long journey.'

"Perhaps we should stay home this evening."

'Look, you've got to stop thinking that one little pill is going to solve all your problems...You need to take at least four, twice a day.'

"And who gave you the first opinion? Facebook, Twitter or Whatsapp?"

"You wanted me to go to that small college..they've gone out of business, and me degree was recalled."

"They're books, Dad needs them for reading."

Psychopath