Doggie Dynamo T-Shirts

'True, he can be annoying. But keep in mind that he's our only source of revenue.'

Jack of all trades

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

'I'm in my Blue period.'

'This one's for marrying him, and this one's for raising the kids.'

Romance

"I hoped you'd change your hobby when you became a father"

'Of course I put my kids first! Look at how much I pay the nanny!!'

"I'm starting my own delivery service. Is there anything you want to borrow from my Dad?!"

"Lovely dovetail."

"If he tries to dip, Mrs. Callister, you mustn't hesitate to use the choke chain."

"Maybe the termite problem should take precedence over the chimney problem."

A holiday at home

To determine which department would be awarded the Billings contract, employees agreed to play a best-of-five dodgeball tournament.

"The club scene is really changing."

'Between the school assignments, sports classes, and dance lessons, I hardly have any time to spend with my dolls.'

Crop duster wanted.

'Where do you keep the elbow grease?'

New! Paint Bombs: 'Light the wick, and you have paint that's extremely easy to apply!'

Thor's Other Tools

Cut out and keep your own D.I.Y expert.

Fuzz - there's a rumor about the band that we only play Metallica covers...

Shop Lifting

Handy-lion

'I told you she could get them all in under a minute. Now pay up.'

Origami time!

"I can't get the blasted tin opener to work."

Reality home-improvement show.

Sharon's more of a do-it-yourselfer.

Meanwhile, back at the 'shape' party... 'Hey, check out the square dancing with Brenda...!'

Lady Gaga.

Exhausted mother holds up 'Off Duty' sign.

Sports Agency. In my work as a sports agent, I told this athlete she needs to improve if she wants to be well-known. Ironically, in diving you become famous by not making a splash! I got this marathon competitor a sponsorship so he can focus on training. He's going to take the money and run! This sprinter will earn a bonus if he sets a record. Oh, going after some fast money! And I made this guy agree to give me an extra slice of his pay if I negotiated a great contract for him which I di