Dog Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Yes, I'm talking to you. I believe you're the only Sparky in the house."

"I miss you too, honey. Now put the dog on."

"It's not enough that we succeed. Cats must also fail."

"I'm starting to really like the smell of cocaine."

Why dogs make the best Valentines

"They were, sitting around the dinner table, knocking off a bottle of Côtes-du-Rhône and blathering about the Middle East – you've never heard such shallow, simplistic reasoning in your life – and one of them turns to me and says, "And what do you think, Barney? What do you think we should do?' and all I could come up with was 'Woof'. I felt like such an ass."

"Is that all you can think about?"

Man's book: '100 Years of Solitude'; Dog's book: '700 Years of Solitude'

"Ever since we got the Border collie, he colors within the lines."

"And what do you think will happen if you do get on the couch?"

"I do like it here, but I'm ready for my own apartment."

"Who are you kidding? You're all about small government until you get stuck in a tree."

"They moved my bowl."

"Artie, they took my bowl."

"They were bred originally to be hors d'oeuvres."

"Shouldn't he be lying at the foot of the bed?"

"Wow! I knew you were rich, but I didn't know you were that rich!"

is it an emergency?

"He's a bird-dog."

A dog looks at birthday cards in increments of seven years.

"Everybody gets a raise."

'We do not do belly rubs, if that's what you are looking for.'

"Chapter One: Call me Scooter..."

'Beg.'

"Who the hell are you going to listen to - the voices in your head, or your best friend?"

Dog swim teams: 'Give me 10 more laps!'

"The Woofs have it."

"Operation Covid 19 worked! All our humans are now staying home with us!"

Why cats shouldn't drive in the rain.

"Email tone is tricky... I can never tell if they're wagging."

"I see you brought a stick. I'm impressed. You've done your homework."

"No, we're looking for a roofer, not a woofer."

'Forget about building trust. Just give the dog a bath.'

'He wants to put his bones in safekeeping.'

'The dog ate my tax receipts...'