Dog Einstein Admirer Pillows

"You're overthinking this."

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

"Now I really hate poetry."

"He was a very good boy."

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

'If he could trace the matching sock I've another 25 or 30 to account for.'

'Sure, it's our pool. . . but who's going to tell him that?'

"It's great to see Biff; Socksie the cat is out of the bag..."

"....And what's the deal with fetch? You want the stick or don't you? Make up your mind already!"

Why Cupid is not allowed to drink alcohol anymore...

'Guy comes up with one interesting theory about special relativity, suddenly he thinks he's freakin' Einstein,'

"Meow"

'Well, they're just great for running down gazelles and jackals!'

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

"That's the preacher's dog."

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

Fifty Shades of Gray

Dogs are smart enough to understand human commands. Cats are smart enough to ignore them.

"Don't tell anyone, but some of my best cartoons are about cats."

"We should get out to the country more often."

There are no rats with collars...

Flea Philosophy.

"Okay, who's purring?"

"I watched a Lassie marathon today and realized that I really need to step up my game."

Hyenas as Pets

Pet owner hanging Obedience School diploma

Dogs and Chickens

"I'm not concerned about us as long as there is nothing in the stimulus package for cats."