Doctors' Day Laughs Mugs

Are you sure you're not holding your breath?

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

"And as soon as he's on the mend,we'll get the physiotherapist in here with a ball of twine."

"I'm afraid you could go at any time."

He was different from the other doctors. For one thing, he refused to play God.

Medical Building Directory: Dr. Larry Nix, Dr. Sally Putty, etc..

Medical personnel give their hearts

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

"If you'd only come to me sooner I wouldn't have had to go to lunch."

'I want to forewarn you that my HMO won't approve any treatment that uses a needle.'

"Hope you don't mind, but I can't find my little hammer."

"That's an awfully large small intestine and an awfully small large intestine."

"I remember when we first met you were an exhausted young doctor! Now you're an exhausted middle-aged doctor!"

'Just follow these simple instructions.'

'My medical school believed laughter is the best medicine.

'Nurse, why is there always a fly in my ointment?'

In case of Emergency: Break Glass

"All my symptoms are old ... "

'Well, what do I have?...Within reason, of course.'

'Oh, believe me -- you don't want to hear it in layman's terms!'

'Do you have to use that? -- tongue depressors make me hungry.'

"Sometimes I wonder why I spent ten years at medical school and another 20 honing my skills..."

'Let me guess...it's contagious!'

'I need to borrow your Ph.D. for a half hour tomorrow. I have a major problem to solve.'

'It may be more inconvenient, but the 'Reverse Prostate Exam' is a lot less embarrassing for the both of us.'

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

"So, let's catch a wellness wave!"

'The doctor will acknowlege your existance now.'

What Do Doctors Dream About?

"You'll feel a pinch and then a burn."