Divine Leadership Enthusiasts T-Shirts

"This is Jesus - he says he's God´s interim manager."

Businesswoman Empowerment

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

Church leader at desk has 3 boxes marked 'Black', 'White' and 'Gray Area'.

How leaders fail

"He's not really much of a leader...he just has a lot of followers."

"Hmmm ... that's interesting. Now, what about ideas that don't suck - do you have any of those?"

"I can motivate everyone except myself."

"Home depot."

"I'm sorry, but we're looking for someone who's more likely to be followed than following."

"Oh, ah, sorry!"

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

"The president demands that staff take responsibility for failures, and the multi-trillion deficit is down to YOU!"

"Serendipity is not a strategy."

Feedback should be sought for genuine reasons, not because you want compliments. . .

A daily rubdown with a beard brush will wrangle awkward bristles and train them downwards...

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

'I give this one about three months...'

'I have been hearing some disturbing comments about you, Parker, some of your employees think you're a nice guy!'

'The ultimate sign of success is when no one puts you on hold.'

'Truth is fine, but I really need marketable ideas.'

"C'mon people! All for me and me for me!"

"Do you have a minute, Bob? I'd like to speak with you about the concept of 'leadership'."

'I knew if we waited long enough, heaven would downsize.'

"Reverend, I recommend you turn the other cheek."

Priest

'I delegate, then I follow up.'

"I guess now's as good a time as any."

'...And for the low visibility positions we can bring people on board who can, you know...do things.'

'Are you sure You can be objective? -After all, You did CREATE them.'

"The GOOD news is that 94 people want to attend the leadership training, the bad news is that 64 of them want to change the venue, 56 the time and 45 want to be course leader."

Someone needs to tell him that having Churchillian leadership skills requires more than a 10'' havana

'I like to greet the new team members myself.'

"Leadership ISN'T just about trying to be BETTER than everyone else!"