Diner Dweller Prints

A menu with risks and benefits

"'Well done' lulled him into complacency."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'Before I order breakfast, which way is it to the 'International Bathroom of Pancakes'?'

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

Countervailing Clichés.

"It's smells so good, but why do you have to wait so long?!"

Alphabet soup gets cold for slow readers.

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

'How is the water prepared?'

Businessman sees sign in window of 'Fred's Chili Bowl' restaurant: 'Now Hiring a Bean Counter'.

What's your thumb doing on my steak? Want me to drop it again?

Frank and Ernie's Country Diner. Special Alphabet Soup. Come in and sit for a spell.

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

"I wish my Dad would get off my back! It's only been nine years and he wants to know if I've picked a major yet!"

I'm not going to send over my manager just because there's a fly in your soup. What about sending over the fly's manager.

''Surprise' starts with an 'S', Wilkins! You're in the wrong drawer again!'

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

Wifi whore

'Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!' 'That's not soup! It's gumbo.'

Student Food Pyramid

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

"Today's special is we'll pull the plug on the jukebox if someone else's music annoys you."

'What wine do you recommend with the peanut butter-filled, deep fried, jalapeno bacon bombs?'

"When it comes to good, old-fashioned roots music, this guy is the BEST!"

"The usual."

"The WiFi password is: 'buysomethingorgetout'."

"I think I might go outside. My fresh air app is glitchy today."

"Sorry Sir, but what exactly were you expecting to be served when you ordered the 'early bird special'."

"Remember, son, no matter what happens to you, we intend to always keep your room at home exactly as it is right now...empty."

'Would you folks care for some fresh maple syrup on your pancakes?'

'Today's special is yesterday's left-overs.'

'This is not Hungarian stew.' 'We ran out of Hungarians.'