Diner Chef Prints

In a coal miner diner, customers have fainted from the fumes.

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'He made an excellent jelly.'

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

'Who gets the decaf?'

"An untested recipe. An uncalibrated oven. Substituted ingredients. And yet, the cake...the cake is...magnificent!"

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

Countervailing Clichés.

'How is the water prepared?'

Businessman sees sign in window of 'Fred's Chili Bowl' restaurant: 'Now Hiring a Bean Counter'.

'Can I have flies with that'

'The food is great, but it's embarrassing the way she always insists on burping you.'

"The after-dinner mint is the boss's idea. I think it's superfluous."

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

Doughnut Making

What's your thumb doing on my steak? Want me to drop it again?

'Well, if you're going to order 'left wings' and I'm going to order 'right,' maybe we should just order burgers instead.'

'A Quarter-Tonner, please.'

"How come we never have 'Baked Alaska'?"

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

'If you order...You can digest it in...'

"Eggshell in omelette make Hulk angry!"

'One placebo or two, doctor?'

Choice hellhole

'Regular or decapitated?'

'Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!' 'That's not soup! It's gumbo.'

"I'll have the prayer breakfast."

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

'Can I get a box for this?'

You're pig-headed, Louis, I like that in a man.