Dignity Seeker T-Shirts

'I'm not asking for a raise Mr. Betenheeler, but would it be possible for you to treat me as a human being?'

'Let me guess - you're looking for the course 'How to grow old with dignity'.'

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"Let's say you've always wanted to make someone a mixtape to show them how much you care about them. What's the best order? Do you start with songs about how rich you are before moving on to the songs about love? Or vice versa?. . .What order would best simulate sincerity?"

He can lean back in contentment on cowslip banks and let everything wash over him.

"Biff's old money, Angelo is new money and Boris is funny money."

I'm looking forward tot he day we can afford some real statues for this place.

The vice-president in charge of sincerity

"No, I'm not really a CEO. I just like to keep up with the Joneses."

"I can remember when having a '212' phone number still meant something in this world."

The cat taught her to live life to the fullest. Which, for an indoor cat, means eat, sleep and stare out the window.

'But this is what you demanded; a corner office with Windows.'

Big Shot/Bigger Shot.

'I have everything a man could want - But I've still managed to hang onto my petty ambitions.'

"If the weather stays good, we could end up in a very prestigious 1992 Cabernet Sauvignon."

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

Yale makes better lock than rival Harvard.

I want a car that says 'I've arrived' but didn't use too much gas getting there.

"Remember, you can do ANYTHING...but for only 80 cents to every dollar earned by a man."

Thought bubble mirrors the cloud in the sky.

"Pastor, may we share a message with you about humility?"

'No, I didn't get a presidential pardon, but I got something better. God has forgiven me.'

"Only three hundred and sixty-seven followers? Maria's not an asset to the abbey."

"Does this desk make my job look big?"

Give up all my possessions? Did I say Buddhist? I meant Boatist. I'm a boatist.

'Can you believe it, Harkins? Out of all those offices, not one person is more important than I am.'

Interning in D.C. Volunteering in Seattle. Trekking in Nepal. Lucky ducks! I'm stuck here working 2 jobs! Wow! You're getting paid?!! Who knew? Employment is this summer's must-have status symbol. Some parents envy you.

"I hear you've got friends in high places...?"

"You like it? It’s from the MoMA Store!"

Hope and ______

"Wow! I knew you were rich, but I didn't know you were that rich!"

"Brooklyn is the Manhattan of the other boroughs."

Sports car style baby buggy.

'This condo is the height of luxury, The sprinkler system sprays Perrier,'

'Yes sir, Thoreau had the right idea.'