Dignitary Pillows

"Will nobody take me litterally?"

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

Kitchen Tetris

Garlic Free Zone.

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

'We're not at home, Stu. You can't just order 'I don't care'.'

'House wine?'

"… She's simply asking that you no longer refer to her as 'the dog.'"

'I'm not asking for a raise Mr. Betenheeler, but would it be possible for you to treat me as a human being?'

'Do you have eczema?' 'No, only what's on the menu.'

'No, I'm not wearing high heels. I look taller because the minimum wage will increase and now I can stand taller.'

His movember moustache made him feel very distinguished.

"'Scuse me, Officer, but where do the elite meet to eat around here?"

'You thought having 'flu would get you out of doing the dishes.'

'Ambiance or non-ambiance?'

'I prefer 'Baby Boomer' over 'Senior Citizen'.'

'You have a comfortable home, three beautiful children, a husband who is devoted to you - what could you possibly want with nuclear capability?'

'Dressage? But Son, what about something more virile like Rodeo or Polo?'

'If you're ready, who wants to go first?'

"The boss started me on the bottom. Not in the mail room, but in the office cafeteria washing dishes."

'Lucifer casts out into Hell'

"He intends to die with dignity. He desires a modest funeral, and he's determined to prevent the buzzards from getting any part of the estate."

"Which comes first - the chicken salad or the egg salad?"

'There is no point in having a spoon rest on the counter for the coffee stirrer, if you're not going to use it!'

"I like to sit here and look at all the things I don't have."

"We had special places in hell but what with the influx of baby boomers we're putting people wherever we can."

'Good gracious, no, nothing for me. I'll just scavenge after my friends have left the table.'

"How we doing for tips today?"

This house needs rules! ...so if you think of any you want to live by, just let us know.

"Are you still working on that?"

A case of great interest at South Kensington Museum - Study from life

'Darling, we're vegetarians. We must stop meat eating like this.'

'Phoning or non phoning?'

Flo tries to look dignified while waiting to hand in her stool sample.