Digital Etiquette Enthusiast Pillows

"I'm not repeating the specials again until everyone puts down their phones."

'I told you never to Facebook, Bebo, Hotmail, Yahoo, MSN or phone me at work...'

Why does he always send as "reply all"?

'Twitter or tweet-free?'

Table Setting, 2014.

The need to be careful on social media.

"Remember, I want to hear fifteen solid minutes of small talk before you ask for the Wi-Fi password."

Office computer: 'Thank you for not using me for personal business.'

"Hey, it's me. I just sent you a text message responding to your e-mail saying that I should IM you."

That's a good question, Ossie... may I call you 'Ossie', Ossie?

"I'm suffering the unbearable loneliness of being right on the internet."

"OK, she's back. Just start slowly, and remember to ask her about herself."

'It was embarrassing. While I was taking up their cell phones, my cell phone rang.'

This problem began in the 1950's...

"This tone means the battery is low. This one means you've just driven over a pedestrian. And this one indicates that someone sitting near you in a coffee shop is about to grab your phone and stuff it down your throat!"

"This circle of hell is for those who always hit Reply to All."

"Can I help you?"

Man in elevator looking at sign that says 'Stare Here.'

"Eye contact is good, but eye contact without blinking is not."

First Church: Sunday's Topic - Thou Shalt Not Blog Against Thy Neighbour.'

"I didn't mind the panel interview, but I got creeped out by the group hug at the end."

"That time you realized your hashtags were longer than your message. #irony #wow #epiphany #wakeupCall #lesson #stopthat #omg #thwarted #notgood #somethingsWrongHere #spiritual-awakening #myword #ohlawdy #wthigh #seriously? #wontSome-bodyThink-of-The-Children?" "ERROR: You have exceeded the number of characters allowed." "That time you. #irony #wow #epiphany #wakeupCall #lesson #stopthat #omg #thwarted #notgood #somethings-WrongHere #spiritualawakening #myword #ohlawdy #wthigh #seriously? #

"Before you go through the gates of heaven think back to the early days of the internet. Did you ever visit or post anything homophobic, racist or sexist? Tell me now or I will find out."

Would it be rude if I didn't follow them all back?

A guest departing a party.

Top Tips For Video Interviews

"Ignoring LinkedIn requests is the new 'get lost'."

Trolling on social media

"And remember, the phone goes to the left of the entree fork."

"How would you like me to answer that question? As a member of my ethnic group, educational class, income group, or religious category?"

Did you take the last cup and not make another pot?

''How am I?' Tsk, you people who don't do facebook! I've got to make up a status update especially for you, have I?'

Modern methods of reading over someone's shoulder.

Tweet Others As You Would Have Them Tweet You.

Online vs. Offline Behaviour