Digital Dilettantes T-Shirts

Don't you wish you'd stayed on at school?

'All I did was touch the screen here, and it called me a misanthrope.'

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

"Well - I've either bought a pack of table napkins, or adopted a Siberian tiger cub..."

'What we need is a decision, not more foot-dragging.'

'Shouldn't we be doing this online?'

"You've called tech-support so often that it was decided that it's more practical if I just come and live with you."

"Forget it - she's out of your league."

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

"Go ahead. Click on 'I Am Not A Robot.' I dare you."

'You know me, I'm a problem solver. I listen. I flirt with understanding. I move on.'

The Internet - Now available in bookstores

"You told me to make a desktop shortcut, so I did. Just take the shortcut I made through the mess."

"Do you mind if I not listen while you talk?"

'I'm trying to figure out online shopping. I've found some pants I like, but I can't find a fitting room.'

'What superpower would I like? Normally, invisibility, but as I'm a 53 year old female, I feel that I've already been granted it.'

"Dating advice from your old man? Ew, weird. Instead, let's ask Stinky Rick."

"It's called a mobile... but I've been here an hour and have yet to see it move."

'Should I buy or sell?'

"Lost all track fo time with you. 93 unread messages!"

"Remember, I'm 'catch and release'."

"Would you prefer sparkling water, filtered water, tap water or water?"

'Okay, okay. On second thought, maybe going on a diet isn't necessary.'

'We've considered every potential risk except the risks of avoiding all risks.'

"I'd text you, but I haven't learnt to spell yet."

They used a scientific method to decide which new product idea to pursue.

'How was my date?...It went OK. He paid for dinner, and he floats. I suppose that has to count for something.'

'Are you fit, attractive male...?'

"The job stress was already bad enough, but now I have to choose between 56 flavors of coffee."

"I am in the moment - just not the moment you're in."

"Of course, you understand you can't possibly stay here tonight."

I'm beginning to realize you can't cram 10 gigabytes of information into a one-gigabyte brain.

The singles bar...

Rusty and Molly's first date was going beautifully until the 'car tyre incident.