Digital Dealmaker T-Shirts

'According to your electronic file...In 1998 you sold your soul to the devil on Ebay...'

'Have your people facebook my people.'

'It's a lot easier now that everybody's selling their souls on e-bay!'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

'Now that I have your attention...'

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

The president's men

A fight in the Boardroom.

'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

'Well the good news is that we've landed some huge contracts in China!'

"What do you think I can get for it on the blackboard market?"

'They sold the company in 2001? I was wondering why things were slow.'

"Mr Frimley will see you now."

"What if he's bluffing? What if he's not? What if the room just gets too hot?"

'Pick a contract...any contract!'

'We divested ourselves of a division here, a subsidiary there, a branch here, an affiliate there...there's nothing left!'

"It's Swamp & Swallow - they're making an offer we can't refuse!"

"I see we're going up against the Big Guys."

'Okay...3.5 billion in stock, 2.5 billion in cash, 80 million in deferred compensation, my own private jet, a luxury car lease for the next ten years, 3 club memberships and...

"We structured the deal so it won't make any sense to you."

Do you want to win the game or my business?

"They've agreed to the merger, the sticking point is who is swallowing who?"

'If we have only fractional ownership, it's not a private jet anymore, is it?'

'He exuded the confidence of an exec who had closed mega deals, and hadn't found a flea in a week.'

Takeovers.

'He's ruthless and greedy... so let's make sure he's on our side.'

"I think I'll have the businessman's lunch."

Opening the door to new customers

You gotta hand it to the old man, he still knows how to motivate!