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"Oh, Jeff, you swore this wasn't a podcast."

'There's nothing on.'

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

"I can always tell when Philip is working on family finances. A 'cursor' appears on both sides of the computer screen."

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"I've given up on the novel. There's more money in writing inspirational memes."

"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."

'With these video-phones, there's just too much documentation on all my promises.'

"Lori, I can’t talk right now — I’m right in the middle of updating my dog’s Facebook page."

"No, I don't play. I just watch people play on the internet."

"Hack back with all you've got!"

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

Freedom of the Press

"Get used to verifications. In the court of the internet, you are presumed a robot until proven otherwise."

'How fast can you hype?'

The Truth

"Well, Sara Kalen is wrong – Edward Snowden is not a 'tattletale.'"

This is Pandora, our new Content Manager.

"I'm recommending more video games. I'm worried about his hand eye coordination."

"Tell me when it's all cyber warfare, and I'll enlist!"

"Ever wonder where all those cat videos come from?"

'For the next sixty seconds, this station will totally freak out....'

Exploring Healthcare Careers

"Yeah, but this is a cat on a skateboard being arrested by a cop with a tattoo of the Confederate flag!"

Federal Departument of Edutainment.

"I'll check your circulation."

'We don't believe a word of this c.v... And we'd like to offer you a job.'

"According to our eye tracking studies,either nobody is looking at the content on our site, or all the participants have lazy eye."

What passes today for 'nose in a book'.

"I can't wait to post this."

"And that was the news. . . But please feel free to go online and vent your spite, spread your conspiracy theories and promote your ill-informed opinions. . ."