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The Computer Bore

Campaign for Plain English

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"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'I'm majoring in communication and minoring in pizza delivery - What about you?'

She - Interpreter - He.

Ruddy bloggers!

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

All of our representatives are busy right now. Stay on the line and someone will be with you in a few miles.

'The usual ‘nod, nod, wink, wink' will do, Walter. We don't need the eyebrow twitch and nostril flares.'

'Don't bite. They're trolling again.'

"Hi, you've reached Susan's desk. I am monotasking right now, so I'll call you back it's the phone's turn again. Beep!"

"When we first started seeing each other, we would always use the same word for snow."

On-the-job creativity may go unrewarded an may even create consternation among co-workers.

"We're so proud. Only 5 months old and already knows how to scroll and swipe."

IT staffer vacation tan lines.

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

They had a tendency to talk past one another.

The Love Psychologists

"Stop squawking. Use your words."

Smartphone Sonogram

Presentation Skills: 1. Be Prepared.

'Before we get started, let's go around the table and practice making eye contact.'

'I was just ringing to see if you'd got the email about my letter.'

"Sure, this camp has swimming, games, fishing, horseback riding and rock climbing. But, does it have Wi-Fi?"

'No, there's nothing on my mind, but if there was I don't want to talk about it.'

Technological advances within the office.

Relationship Issues.

'He says he needs his own space.'