Diet Rebels Mugs

Woman reads book entitled: '101 reasons to postpone your diet.'

"I'm a monster."

"The diet is blown. I had a threesome and then ate both of them."

'You realize the first three letters in diet spells DIE'

"Why are we eating all this fattening stuff? Pier pressure."

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

Any time is cake o'clock

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

Chocs away.

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

'Ahh...now there's a man who understands women.'

'You put him on a diet, so he put you on a diet.'

Blog Breakdown

Toxic Waste Lorry/Toxic Additives Lorry

"I AM following doctor's orders. He told me to cut back to one cup a day...right?!"

"Croissants? Donuts? Chocolate? Good price, madame! Good price!"

"I think the problem is that you're not eating properly..."

"This is our high-traffic, reinforced, heavy-duty model."

"Touch that and you're a dead man."

'I always shop here. They don't sell low fat ice cream so the guilt is gone.'

'What makes the Tower of Pisa lean?' 'It never eats.'

"We tried healthy birthday treats. That lasted about a week."

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

"Beans count as healthy vegetables but jelly beans don't? Not faaaiiir!!!"

'The good news is you don't have to worry about cholesterol, carbs, or trans fat.'

Dieting is for losers.

'I'm on the workaholic's diet. I only eat when I can put it on an expense account.'

Attempting to eat your own bodyweight in cake can act as a mood enhancer.

'Headmaster I'd like to report Biggins and Small who were caught this morning consuming trans-fats behind the bicycle shed.'

'It's the half-empty bag of cookies from the back of the pantry. Should I tell them you'll call back?'

Diet Enforcer

"If you're as smart a refrigerator as they say you are, you'll keep your mouth shut about this."

The cake diet.

"Sorry, kid, the nutrition nannies threatened to shut me down if I didn't change from chocolate to tofu Easter eggs."

"I just thought maybe we should consider letting ourselves go now instead of waiting a few years into our marriage."