Dictation Dynamo T-Shirts

'Make sure that when you type this up, you leave the 'caps lock' button on.'

How leaders fail

"Russ had a novel published two hours ago and has a children's book coming out in 20 minutes."

"Where do we put Desserts?"

Annual run-off at the mouth.

Romance

'I'm designing a robot that'll do my drafting homework for me,'

"Quick! The ideas are hatching!"

In - Out - Pending.

'As my subordinate, naturally I expect you to take the heat on things that otherwise would make me uncomfortable.'

"Quick, let's make the decision before everyone else shows up!"

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

Donald Trump

"Does the N.R.A. know about this?"

Engineer on the move.

"Yes, Robert. Reasonable people can have different interpretations of things, but not this thing."

"Of course, that's just my opinion. If you want my professional opinion it will cost you."

Arrogant junior barrister

'It takes great courage of conviction to know you're wrong, yet still proceed forward.'

Nothing like a Strong Message for the Midterms

"I've been on a diet for 5 weeks and can safely tell you that I've lost 5 weeks."

"Be afraid my friends...if the government takes over your healthcare, you're going to be left with nothing!"

"And keep in mind that the only stupid question is the one that isn't asked. Discussion?"

Got Rationality?

"I want to forewarn you—tonight's topic seems to be phallocentrism, and Jessica is in a take-no-prisoners mood."

Businessman has in/out boxes labeled: Stay The Course and Cut And Run.

A bunch of global warming skeptics want to join eco club. It's a school organization. You have to let them in. But they just want to harass us with selective facts! Today: Eco club. So? Debate is good. You have :An Inconvenient Truth" to counter their arguments. Oh. Great. Now we'll have to read it.

'The kids are on a hunger strike, I'm on a diet, and you're on your own.'

'Miss Johnson, would you mind ordering me another computer? And you can cancel that call to tech-support.'

Business of Finger-pointing

Obese man using a exercise machine. His false teeth are flying out.

"Afterward, there will be a short Q. and A. that will be just long enough for one person to take up too much of it."

"Tell the Greeks austerity is necessary to finance our campaign to explain why austerity is necessary."

Jeremy Corbyn

"The character I'm playing has Alzheimer's disease. So, I'm bound to forget my lines occasionally!"