Desk Juggler Pillows

'Gutherie's a genius at clearing the paperwork - I don't know how he does it.'

Golfing Boss

Health Warning - This job will lead you to drink.

'Sometimes I wonder what I's do without you!'

"Shannon, some work wound up on my desk again."

"I like to keep a clean desk...."

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

"Worst case of month-end burnout I ever saw."

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

'I'll be late for dinner, dear, I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

Can do...No can do

'Had I known Hell was going to be exactly like work, I probably wouldn''t have spent as much time there.'

'Sorry, suffering from burnout return in a week.'

"Morning, all!"

Multi-tasking.

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

"They've hiked up our targets again...I'm going to have to put in some overtime to have any chance of meeting them!"

"It has come to my attention that some work-from-home employees aren't maintaining company standards."

Time for More Paperwork

"I'm overpaid and underworked, but you don't see me complaining!"

Food Chain, Inc: 'UP...DOWN'.

'Can you do more work then is humanly possible?'

'Lion Tamer experience hey? Well, I have a project currently needing your management skills...'

'I need to talk to you about the coffee fund.'

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

"(Huff) Here's (huff) your (huff) tea (huff... huff... huff... huff...)" "I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin?" "All (huff) across America, (huff) office workers are ditching (huff) their desks and walking (huff) on treadmills while they work." "Can I get some water?" "Coming right up." "Good thing I wore my tripping shoes."

Office Supplies/Coffee Supplies.

'It's 930am ma'am - time to meet the Board of Detractors.'

'I want to claim for black marker pens.'

Lumbar support animal